This year I turned 30…it was pretty fu#$ing epic. I had an
80’s party at my apartment and spent my actual birthday drinking sangria and
dancing with my six-month-old nephew to 60’s and 70’s music (really actually
one of the best birthday years in a while).
Most people spend their 30th birthday in a lot more elaborate
ways, like by cruusin’ to Mexico via Carnival, but mine was mellow and spent
with good friends and my parents…it was good for me. I bring up 30, because it
also marked an age that most people dread especially if they are currently
single.
I feel like
dating at 30 is a whole different ballgame. Like if you don’t hit a homerun by
25 as a female in the dating world, the men left are of a whole other breed.
Single but divorced with two kids…ugh sorry, but I don’t even know if I want my
own child sir. The 24-year-old who has “mommy issues” and chases older women,
but still wants to act like every night out is a trip to TAO at the Venetian in
Las Vegas. The half-ies, which is a group I consider the 26-35 year olds who
are still single/want a relationship/ still want to party at TAO/ yet like you
one day/ don’t like you the next/ still are unsure of what they want to do with
their life/ they are jealous of their married friends yet don’t want to get
married yet/ waste of my time. If you saw my inbox on dating websites you would
understand how frustrating dating at 30 is in comparison to dating at 23. There
are not a lot of fishes in the sea anymore…the good ones are taken, gay, in the
middle of a divorce or still not ready for a commitment…that’s what I have
learned. So at 30 and single, dating is pretty much leaving me still sexless in
the desert at this moment.
Just like
everyone else in this world I want to find my BBFL (Best Boy For Life…not sure
if this is a real abbreviation, but when I find him I plan to start adding
#BBLF to every pic of us on Instgram…just sayin). I think all men are great. My dating life/
chillin with men experiences have truthfully helped me to decide what I want
and don’t want in a BBFL, in order for me to avoid the “Big D” and find true
happiness. I don’t stress out about finding a guy at my age, because I feel
like I am chasing my fu$%ing time-clock… I just am at the time in Ife where I
am ready to find the person I can share my life with and have a lot of fun
with.
I saw one
of those quotes everyone shares on Facebook the other day that I think bests
describes my expectations as a single-lady (at 30 I guess lady begins to
apply). The quote stated, “ I believe that if life gives you lemons, you should
make lemonade…and try to find somebody whose life has given them vodka, and
have a party.”…I saw this and thought to myself…”Fo-real! That is exactly what
I am looking for in life”. I mean I’m not a full-blown alcoholic, but I like craft-beer,
margaritas and moscato and enjoy good times, while achieving a buzz every now
and then, I’m A’ Merikan that’s what we do. I want to find someone who wants to
enjoy life as a “party”, money isn’t everything, a house and kids I guess if
its in the cards, but truthfully someone I can just laugh with, like a best
friend. I am ready for a good mixture of lemonade and vodka.
In my
dating life in general, not just the sexless cacti-land, I have recently
learned that dating at my age is definitely more difficult, but it offers good
stories and makes this blog a lot more exciting. I also realized recently that with the quote
above sometimes as women we offer lemonade, but we may be looking for a certain
type of vodka. Maybe you prefer Kettle One or Smirnoff or you are ok with
settling for grocery-store brand vodka (please bring your levels higher,
because Stater Bros. brand vodka made me vomit all night once when I was
20…just sayin). Anyways, my point is that even though I wish I wasn’t single I
decided recently that I haven’t found the right vodka to mix with my lemonade
and that’s ok. Every dating experience teaches me something new and even though
recently I have been experiencing Smirnoff vodka, I know the Grey Goose brand
will come one day. This is why my new dating motto...”On to the Next!!!”
Although the
fishes in the sea are scarce, I will continue my attempt and share along the
way. When things don’t work out though it is ok to be upset…just sayin’… but
with a motto like “On to the Next” or as my boss says, “ Guys are like
buses…there’s always another one to pick you up”…I’m telling you dating at 30
is a lot more easier. And knowing what kind of vodka you prefer makes the
deletion process a whole lot easier and saves a lot of heartbreak…just sayin’.
