Monday, March 4, 2013

Sexless in the Desert...OkCupid in Scorpionville


The desire to fulfill my need for companionship found me once again scrolling through my Inbox on OKCupid, but this time desert style. The messages exceed the comedic level of those received in my home state of California. Seriously though, with my experience with men…the messages do not surprise me.

“Very sexy. We should do it (insert bad form of phrase) sometime!”…Thanks? I could not respond to this message. I felt suddenly that I died and found myself reincarnated as a prostitute on Harbor Blvd. The young male that wrote these words to me does deserve a high five for brutal honesty on the other hand.

A 19-year-old male said, “Do you have any interest in “hooking up” with a younger guy?” I did not sign up to loseyourvirginitymingle.com. Nowhere in my profile do I report that I am “DTF” jersey shore style…just sayin’.

“I am a professional poker player and I live with my parents.” No honey, I saw a red flag in this message and it screams my parents support my gambling problem.

I went on date with a respectable, nice man, with a job and enjoyed his company in the friend zone, but once again felt my inner fate seeker whisper to me that online dating feels forced. Interview questions for an hour and half (towards the middle of these dates I always wished I stayed at home and read a book). The decent men on OKCupid remind me of little girls dreaming of white picket fences and mini vans (my dreams of the near future involve traveling and a career change…and I would never drive a mini van).

I found a quote today in my pocket book, “Live Love Laugh”, which I felt applied to my dating traumas. “It is only possible to live happily ever after on a day to day basis.”-Margaret Bonnano.

I decided today to stop the search for companionship. My whole life I bought into the “they lived happily ever after” fantasies, I know my best friend for life will not show up on a white horse, but truthfully I finally realized he would not appear via OkCupid message either. I deleted my app and I’m signing offline, for good.

I believe in fate and love, the old fashioned way. When you catch eyes with someone from across the room and feel compelled to be in their presence whatever the cost. Best friends attempting to live life happily together one day at a time. I know the fairy tale life does not exist, but I do feel if I wait and stop searching, Mr. Right will be worth the wait and together we will attempt to live happily one day at a time.

 Until the day my match-up with fate arrives, I remain sexless in the desert and my online dating life must come to an end (the troubles of single life will still continue via sexless in the desert).

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